By Simon Hole
They come in at least twice a week, always want a booth, always end up in my section. They sit all night even when we’re crowded and people are waiting. I could turn that table over three times if they’d just leave. But they don’t. Instead they ask for coffee refills, always reminding me, “Make sure it’s decaf!”
And when they finally go, they always pay with a credit card and leave no tip. Not once. Never. Nada.
Tonight I fill that orange-rimmed carafe with regular coffee and take it to their table.
“Need a refill?”
I smile as I pour.
Revenge is a cup best drunk cold!
You mean like ice coffee?
Holey cow! That hurt!!
Terrific.
Good one, Simon. One just has to wonder just what sort of utterly menacing revenge the coffee-pourer has up his sleeve. Clever of you to leave it up to us what short of punishment is to be meted out! Aha!–Could the orange-rimed carafe contain…but no, better leave it to my sinister imagination!
I am sorry to say that I have been that customer before… Hopefully, the tip part was not true… But probably not enough?