Delia waited impatiently for her ridesharing car. Initially, the tiny icon on her screen made great progress, with the timer clicking steadily downward. But then the countdown ceased, and the icon remained stationary near Fourth and Main.
Delia considered canceling, but the projected arrival time was less than five minutes and the service would ding her for a minimum charge. Instead, she sent Jim a text message telling him she’d be late for their date.
Meanwhile, Jim was busy being pronounced dead near Fourth and Main after being struck by a driver in a hurry to pick up her next fare.
Didn’t expect such a brilliant ending. Wasn’t sure if the word ‘busy’ worked or not, but in the end decided it was fine. Interested what others think.
This teaches us; tell time to make time, we take our own time, and we’ll be fine
Great job of telling a complete story in 101 words. Loved it!
My mouth flew open at the extremely surprising ending. Oh my golly! Excellent work!
‘Busy’ definitely works, juxtaposed with ‘being pronounced dead’. Clever, effective. Irony and tragedy in a handful of words. Nice work.
‘her’ next fare… :/