By Gary Davison
9:07 PM
Shots rock a convenience store; Four people inside.
Seconds earlier…
Waving his gun, the robber screams, “Open it!”
Hands shaking, the clerk fumbles at the register. A siren’s heard.
Choking the clerk… “You pushed the alarm, asshole!”
A shot from behind misses; the robber spins, shooting wildly. A hiding customer returns fire, while the clerk pulls a 12-gauge from below the counter and begins shooting…
9:12 PM
Police and Paramedics arrive. Just inside, two dead, one paralyzed. In the candy aisle, blood pools around a dropped bag of jelly beans and a mother of three.
She has a pulse.
The whole thing was powerful, but that last line is a stomach-kick. Very well done.
Thanks Laura… I appreciate you taking the time to comment.
Wow, proces a great deal of emotion with only 101 words. The ending really get you. Very well written.
Thanks Stacy… I’m pretty sure the mother makes it.
Yes! This is a great piece at only 101 words! And the ending was attention-getting.
Thanks Bobby… 101 words makes you distill a story down to its concentrated essence.