By Dean Steadman
The sidewalk had a freshly chalked hopscotch, a little wonky but playable. Darlene couldn’t resist and, at age 87, she went from 1 to Safe and from Safe to Sorry in less than a minute.
“Really?” the young doctor asked. “Hopscotch?”
“Wasn’t kickboxing, doc,” Darlene replied, thinking how a well-placed boot…
“Positive thoughts only,” she stopped herself, a rule she tried faithfully to follow.
For hadn’t she been “positive” in believing she could bend down to retrieve her marker without falling? Her wedding ring. She could have left it there, twenty years a widow. But it was her source of equilibrium.
Loved it. Fun and pathos beautifully combined..
Rich wording, whole and resonating. Well done!
I love this! Well told story and the character really came to life in just a few words.
Wonderful story! Loved your MC. Thanks for sharing.
wow, great story…haven’t we all jumped on a game board etched on the sidewalk no matter our age??
I hope I’m like Darlene,determined to live life to the fullest come what may. Nothing wonky about your story. Descriptive, poignant, and I’m right there hopping with Darlene.
Very well done Dean. Using the wedding ring as a dual purpose of the marker and the equilibrium of her life was very clever and gave the story what it needed.
Exc. Dean – we don’t all like bingo, bocci, bowling…some of us like more exciting pursuits – I’n not in my 80s but even at 71 I resent it when I’m typecast as an old weak person. Bravo!