By A. Gregory
Down a long dirt road, a light appeared out of the darkness. At the untrodden road’s end stood a lone, small decrepit house concealed by overgrown pine trees. Its windows boarded and its bold red paint faded, cracked, and peeling. Through the cracks of the boarded windows, a glowing light shone, disturbing the shadows. Inside the barren house was a small single table, on top of which was a slender white candle with a flame dancing in the night. A small wind gust crept through the cracks in the boarded windows, and once more the red house was filled with darkness.
No dialogue. No characters. But real sense of story. Lump in your throat stuff.
Very descriptive, great job!
Totally enjoyed this tease. Could be the beginning of a great mystery!
My favorite line is, “…disturbing the shadows…” – a beautiful, understated image! The conflict between light and dark is always a perfect metaphor – certainly one for our current times (in several ways!) Well done!
The reoccurring theme of darkness really speaks to the reader – great job! The descriptive language really painted a picture and I love how you let the reader pick the fate of the story. You left readers with some questions and it’s up to them to answer, giving them a sense of identity through the piece. Amazing job!
Great piece! I love the descriptive language.
Wonderful piece. One has the feeling of actually being down a long lonely road.
Nice work! I love the vocabulary you chose to incorporate into this piece.
Well done! Makes me want to know who lived there, why is it shuttered, who lives there now and lit the candle? I want to read more.