By Taylor
His body was frail. Pale skin enveloped his lanky figure. Late nights painted their way beneath his eyes. Tufts of hair stuck out in different directions. The corners of his mouth were upturned ever so slightly, causing my heart to quiver.
My eyes hastily scanned over every inch of his face, mentally noting exactly how he looked in this moment. I ran my teeth over my bottom lip nervously, lifting my head to look at the man waiting for me.
“It’s him,” I choked out.
The emotionless man simply nodded, pulling the sheet back over the face I hadn’t finished memorizing.
Good description, inviting anticipation until final release. Well done.
Strong descriptions paint a scene of love and sadness/loss, noticing the little things, like tufts of hair and “late nights painted their way beneath his eyes” (brilliant line)- Well done!
Touching. Nicely done!
Wow! This is really a GOOD one. The last line is a shocker. Wish I had written this!
Wow! Great ending.
The immense detail of this story and the focus on the small things that would have typically gone unnoticed is very captivating, each of the 101 words was clearly chosen with care. Great approach and deliver, please keep writing!
Poignant. I had to read this one twice….
This is what greatness looks like before we realize it. We will see this author again in a different forum.