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Knee-Jerk Reaction

October 9, 2021 15 Comments

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The crunching sound reminded me of a child eating cereal without milk. That it emanated from my left kneecap in Morse code was rather disturbing.

Not that I understood Morse code. The Cub Scouts expelled me before that lesson. But I could hear short crunches and long crunches in a distinctive pattern, so I surmised it was Morse code.

I frantically copied the dashes and dots on the back of an envelope, then found an app on my phone to decipher them into words. I stared, stunned, at the result. Hello, we’ve been trying to reach you about your vehicle’s warranty.

By Howard Dart Humeston

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Karisa Moore says

    October 9, 2021 at 7:14 am

    As one who has received thousands of vehicle warranty calls from all over the nation and who also has a persistent clicking in my knee, I am disturbed. That being said, I am laughing hysterically and sharing your post with my family.

    Well laid out, descriptive, and downright funny!

    Reply
  2. Helen Connell says

    October 9, 2021 at 7:18 am

    This really made me laugh. Great Flash!

    Reply
  3. RRMitchell says

    October 9, 2021 at 8:41 am

    Congrats on a great flash story. Funny!

    Reply
  4. Faith says

    October 9, 2021 at 8:55 am

    Hysterical!

    Reply
  5. Bob Ellis says

    October 9, 2021 at 9:13 am

    Hysterical. Really hit a nerve, but in my elbow!

    Reply
  6. Ed N. White says

    October 9, 2021 at 9:20 am

    I love it. I live it. A huge laugh. I will read it aloud to my knee brace as I struggle with the Velcro closures

    Reply
  7. Kevin says

    October 9, 2021 at 9:22 am

    Great piece.

    Reply
  8. John Philipp says

    October 9, 2021 at 9:35 am

    I missed a character arc for you or your knee. Perhaps that was because I was laughing so hard. : )
    Nicely done.

    Reply
  9. Robert Balentine Jr. says

    October 12, 2021 at 9:33 pm

    Great ending, Dart.

    Reply
  10. Veronique Aglat says

    October 13, 2021 at 9:36 am

    I enjoyed this story a lot! Thanks!

    Reply
  11. Ruth Mannino says

    October 13, 2021 at 11:20 am

    I want to know why the cub scouts expelled you! Lol! Thanks for the laugh!

    Reply
  12. Kim Taylor Clark says

    October 13, 2021 at 2:53 pm

    Oh my goodness, I need to consult my warranty too!! Great idea. Made me laugh! Thank you

    Reply
  13. Valli Henry-Boldini says

    October 14, 2021 at 11:53 am

    Very clever tale…well done… I enjoyed the fantasy…

    Reply
  14. DeRicki says

    October 17, 2021 at 11:49 am

    Hilarious, relevant and masterfully penned, Howard!

    Once I crossed 60, unwanted calls increased dramatically. It was the bane of my existence until I finally got a robocall screening app. Take THAT vehicle warranty telemarketers!?

    Reply
  15. Deanna Salser says

    October 18, 2021 at 1:08 pm

    That was very good.

    Reply

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