By Molly Prep
The hollow ding and dong behind your door fade as they go deeper into the house to summon you.
How often have I stood here, waiting to be let in?
Think of the winters I stand on your doorstep, hoping you’ve put coffee on to fill my mug and thaw my frozen fingers. Think of my aching legs, waiting to collapse into my indent on your couch. Think of how I watch for your face, wanting to see you open the door, smile, and kiss me.
I’ve spent so much time waiting. Too much.
No more doorbells.
I want a key.
Great story.
Good story, Molly, great buildup and surprise ending.
Quite right! Well thought out
Yes, give that person a key!! Good one!
Love the bell sound that fades deep into the house. That’s a really nice sound description. Well done!
Very nice. I know how that feels.
Great shift from passive to assertive – everyone should have a balance of those moments in life to draw on.
I loved your description of the doorbell. Really great story.
Great development. Every image builds to the relationship between the two. Loved the line, “my indent on your couch”.
There were two images that I loved in particular- the ding and dong of the resounding doorbell, and ‘my imprint on your couch’. Well done!
Margaret Sargent
Nice story, Can imagine, feel and keep thinking at the end.
Great story, beautiful descriptions
Very nice. I like the determination at the end.