By Richard Edenfield
Her pulse joined mine as we held hands, one beat filling in the gap of the other to create one long string attached to our dreams that floated above our heads in a panorama of desire.
Her hair flashed curious perfume into the lap of my eyes that blinked as they consumed the perfection of her aura’s smile.
We walked silently toward an unknown future with our breathing linked like ghost heartbeats.
We laughed at the moment that held us in the fluorescent embrace of a moonshot umbrella.
The city surrounded with children light, stars falling witness to our perfect shine.
One great big metaphor; incredible imagery; heart-warming stuff. Richard, you outdid yourself with this one–and it’s definitely a WINNER!
Thank you for your supportive comments.
So over the top it teeters on the edge, but pulls it off with a gigantic synesthetic flourish. Good going. That’s a super-concentrate of words.
Thank you. Like your new picture.
Loved the line our breathing linked by ghost heartbeats. Did you repeat words at the beginning of paragraphs, she, she, then we, we for effect?
No. Did not do it for effect. It just sort of happened that way. Like leather ages. If you work hard enough your writing ages. And then shines with a nice patina.
Wonderful imagery here. You’ve painted a beautiful picture!
Thank you.