When he saw me eating the apple, his mouth hardened, as if carved in stone.
“Get out.”
It was a lot of fuss to make over fruit, but I crawled back. He leaned on the locked garden gate and said I must earn forgiveness.
Later, he made more rules. Dress modest. Don’t question.
Between tantrums he was sweet, all manna and rainbows.
Once he burned two cities to prove a point. I told myself he knew best.
What he did to the Galilean girl, I couldn’t forgive. She was just a kid.
He promised me heaven. It feels more like hell.
Hope this is no more than a fictional perspective piece. If there’s any truth to the sentiments, I’m sorry you were taught wrong. The gatekeeper image is misused too often.
Nicely done, Hannah.
Interesting and well written.
“Galilean girl?” Mary Magdalene, Salome, Joanna? Not sure to whom you refer. Otherwise, liked the piece.
Clever and imaginative piece of writing – loved the POV of the eternal woman – lots to ponder and discuss but I just enjoyed it as a story in its own right.
You’ve put layers of meaning into 101 words. Well done. The biblical allusions, and the “fate” of women in religious/ moral contexts is powerful and brilliantly done in a mere 101 words.I took the Galilean girl to be Mary, mother of Jesus – a woman who is the basis for a religion that has over the centuries demeaned and marginalized other women. (Though in truth, the identity is less important than the power of the story)
Sad indeed that the narrator misunderstood. She heard “earn” when He really said “ask for.”
Did “to” the woman? Another misunderstanding. He did “for” her–exalting her to be the queen of heaven.
Like your story very much because it’s well written and leads the mind in many directions. My take is that you are referring to the Eve of the famous Adam and Eve. Please note that heaven and hell many times comes of our own making and has little to do with the outside forces we THINK influence our lives. You… I think you have your head and heart in the right place and pose the correct questions in all of your endeavors. Continue writing other pieces like this and you’ll go far in this world.
As is clear from some of the above comments, religion is a touchy subject. I thought this was one of the best pieces on this site in quite awhile. The history of Christianity is very anti-woman. It is a pity that some think you were “taught wrong.”
And I agree with Janice. You should not be made to feel guilt or shame over an excellent story, well written.
This is a well written, well thought out story. 101 words? Word master extraordinaire.
You can always ask questions. Just ask because you really want to know and not because you want to entrap the One you ask