By Shannon James
The snow began to fall this evening. Translucent flakes of white drifting to the ground and melting into nothing. I watched from the kitchen window, in the warmth, as I scrubbed my hands in the sink.
The flakes thickened and hurtled towards the earth, battering the frozen ground. From graceful ballet to frenzied tango in a handful of moments.
The snow changed the landscape white, into a blank canvas. A fresh start. It even covered the new grave I dug behind the rose beds. That gave me more time. I turned the taps off, letting the murky, red water drain away.
Wow! I didn’t see that twist coming. Very well done Shannon.
Shiverrr – nice reveal.
I like the red murky water but snow doesn’t hurtle or batter the ground. Maybe hailstones do. Showing and telling, too many adjectives, adverbs.
This snow remined me of Forrest Gump’s rain.
I liked it but can see the point about battering the ground. Not the best word to describe a snowflake in action. Also, I have to admit I did expect an ‘eerie’ twist in the end after ‘I scrubbed my hands in the sink’. Unless you are a doctor before the surgery or you just finished planting potatoes in the ground, why would you scrub your hands on a cold winter evening. Wash yes, but scrub…hm…
Isn’t she trying to scrub blood off?
Yes, that is why I said that the ending was somewhat predictable as I expected it because of the word “scrubbed”. Still, it’s a good story.
Absolute elegance tear to my eye , a young talent !!
Yes! Love this! Awesome ending.
Smart writing!
You sick SOB. Great story! 🙂
wow! I love the imagery!
So stunning, love this piece!
I love the imagery and the twist
so clever.
Lively images and precise description. Well done, Shannon.