|
Win Cash Prizes & Get Professional Feedback @ Flash Fiction Magazine
|
101 Word Short Stories
By Coco Jane
She said hello and hugged me warmly, then sat on the couch and smiled.
I should know her name. I looked and looked, and I knew I knew her, but I just couldn’t place her. Doggone it, so familiar.
Younger than I am…a child…no, she’s a grownup. Someone I have known for a long time.
I rubbed my temples and tried so hard to remember. Someone I care about. Who is this?
The only thing I could think of to say was, “I love you.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
September 12 & 13 on Zoom
Enrollment closes Thursday, September 3 at 7:00 PM Pacific
If your descriptions are vivid but your stories still feel thin, this workshop is for you.
Join award-winning author Nina Schuyler to learn the difference between description, which tells a reader what things look like, and imagery, which carries plot, character, and meaning at the same time.
In just two days, you'll learn to choose images that hold emotion without naming it, pair them so each one deepens the other, and build patterns that gather meaning as the story moves.
Well done. A nice piece of writing.
Heartbreaking!
Incredible use of words to activate such emotion
So true, so sad
Beautifully written. So emotional.
Yes, I’m sure that’s what was in “Mom’s” mind. Well done. To the point.
I read it twice and then couldn’t stop thinking about it.
How distressing that would be. Nice snippet, sucked me right in.
What a story! Initially, I didn’t get it all right. How could someone fail to recognize someone else in this manner? Plain rubbish. I was almost dismissive.
Then the realization dawned on me after the second read. Especially after reading the last two lines :
The only thing I could think of to say was, “I love you.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
It was clear that the woman knew the other, younger lady. Then suddenly a thought cropped up in my head. What if the lady is in an Old Age Home suffering from some kind of schizophrenia?
The story took a completely new meaning from then on, opening up a sea of possibilities.
Fantastic writing, Coco Jane. Thanks for this thought-provoking story, for telling so much with such masterly use of so few words.
Keep writing and entertaining. Stay blessed.
Really good.
Thanks, everyone.
This actually happened to me when I visited my mother, who has Alzheimer’s. I decided to write it from her perspective.
I don’t often comment here, but felt I had to for this one.
Beautiful piece, well written, and I’m so sorry you and your family are enduring such turmoil. My wife recently visited her 94 year old grandfather that has just been moved to a nursing home. She would have been heartbroken if he didn’t recognise her.
My favourite sentences were the first and the last.
The first not so obvious. Simple, but had kind of a rhythm to it, and set the tone. The last… well that speaks for itself.
Well done.
Another great story from Coco Jane.
What a sweet, jagged pill of truth.
Thank you! _Mark