By Gary Davison
“Let go! Mine!” the boy yelled.
“Nooooo—it’s mine!” the girl screamed.
The toddlers were in a ferocious tug-of-war; a stuffed teddy bear was their prize. The
boy clung tight to one fuzzy arm, as the older girl just reeled him in, twisting and flopping
like a thirty-pound tuna.
The struggle escalated with wrestling on the floor. Suddenly, the boy let out a wailing shriek.
Separating them, the mother saw the red welt on the boys arm and scolded the girl. “We don’t bite!”
Scurrying back to its web full of babies under the sofa, the spider thought, ‘But we do.’
Eliminating passive verbs such as “was” and “were” will make you a better writer.
Thanks Jeff… I can use all the help I can get.
Well structured with a beautiful twist.
Thank you, I’m glad you liked it.
Okay, I didn’t see that one coming. I always like it when someone surprises me. A winner, Gary.