By Richard Edenfield
A tightrope pulled across a dark sky as if the air were a puppet. I’m moving on a breath of light. Down below, the solid black evening.
There’s illumination around me. A swirling effect. Moonlit snow.
I focus on the horizon. Breeze stiff. Thoughts of my frightened wife in the car with eyes shut. Have to make it for her.
I get to the end.
My alcohol level was three times the legal limit. But the officer let me go with a warning.
‘Tightrope’ by Stevie Ray Vaughan, played on our car radio. I carefully followed the string of notes home.
I very much enjoyed this story! in part because, in 101 words, it has more than one level. Usually there’s 1 twist. Yours has 2, and communicates interesting relationships between man and wife, between man and his semi-inebriated state, and man and music. Stellar metaphors. a 101-word story that is bursting its seams, but in a very intelligent way.
Thank you for being so generous as to comment in a way that would make any writer blush.
What a well-thought, clever piece! Nice imagery, depth, it works on multiple levels.. It´s going to resonate with me for some time, thanks!
Thanks for your kind comment.
This is masterful.
Thank you.
No, thank you for your comment.
I agree with the above remarks, Richard. This story is a metaphor on several levels and says a great deal in a very few words. I think this is the best of your stories that I’ve read so far. Keep it up!
Thank you.
I have been waiting for the name ‘Edenfield’ to appear in the 101 words daily story email; this one, as usual, did not disappoint! Great imagery, plot twists, and beautiful language. Still not sure how you cram so much in 101 words…..
Thank you.