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Unpacking

November 19, 2022 23 Comments

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The red suitcase trundles past again. A green ribbon informs me that it isn’t mine.

A few bags are left wobbling on the circulating belt. The diminishing crowd is also beginning to wobble—with anxiety.

My escape had been a flash reaction. Always fermenting, dreamily preparing but, until yesterday, just going round and round in my mind. Renewed aggression had forced me into action.

My red suitcase quickly stuffed with fragments of hope, then honest words scribbled and pushed under the sugar bowl. Now, away from the baggage of home, I grab someone else’s. A wheel is missing. That doesn’t matter.

By John Holmes

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Geja Hadderingh says

    November 19, 2022 at 2:45 am

    I love this story – so much ‘packed’ in it.

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 19, 2022 at 7:31 am

      Thanks. It’s better to be the writer than the person in the plot.

      Reply
  2. David says

    November 19, 2022 at 6:54 am

    Top-notch. So much to admire and conveys something bigger than the 101 words allows. I love the baggage carousel metaphor. It feels like a lot of work went into this piece of microfiction and it pays off.

    Reply
  3. John Holmes says

    November 19, 2022 at 7:31 am

    Thanks. A very encouraging comment.

    Reply
  4. Yolanda Joosten says

    November 19, 2022 at 10:35 am

    It feels like you carefully curated each sentence. It’s a great story.

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 19, 2022 at 1:51 pm

      Thanks Yolanda. When you only have 101, every word counts – I could never write a novel!

      Reply
  5. Lesley Bungay says

    November 19, 2022 at 11:46 am

    Sometimes in life you have to step off the carousel – Great story ?

    Reply
    • Lesley Bungay says

      November 19, 2022 at 11:49 am

      Oops an erroneous question mark. Should be a full stop. It is a great story.

      Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 19, 2022 at 1:52 pm

      Thanks Lesley?
      You’re right – and sometimes leave your baggage behind.

      Reply
  6. JK Hayward-Trout says

    November 19, 2022 at 12:27 pm

    Love the imagery and melancholy of this piece.

    Reply
  7. John Holmes says

    November 19, 2022 at 1:55 pm

    Thank you. By pure coincidence I was at an airport today – a lot of emotion to be found there – and the odd wobbly wheel.

    Reply
  8. Kathy Carroll says

    November 19, 2022 at 1:55 pm

    This is a wonderfully devised story—complex, evocative, and emotional, with a fantastic metaphor and a just-right ending—that will really stay with me.

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 19, 2022 at 9:06 pm

      Thanks for such a positive comment. It’s thoughts like yours that motivate.

      Reply
  9. Scott Bogart says

    November 19, 2022 at 6:11 pm

    Nice!

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 19, 2022 at 9:07 pm

      Thanks Scott, glad you liked it.

      Reply
  10. Elaine Hannington says

    November 20, 2022 at 11:56 am

    This is brilliant, easily relatable to and so clever with the allegoric references. Well done! I look forward to the next one.

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 21, 2022 at 6:49 am

      Thanks for your lovely comment, Elaine.

      Reply
  11. David says

    November 23, 2022 at 11:06 am

    Waiting for luggage is the most stressful of times. Enjoyed your story, hope the cases turned up in VN.

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 24, 2022 at 10:13 am

      Ha, sounds like you have inside info and are tracking the baggage.

      Reply
  12. Doug Jacquier says

    November 23, 2022 at 5:23 pm

    Great piece. Perhaps our future might be at the Lost Luggage counter. 😉

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 24, 2022 at 10:11 am

      Yes, life is much more fun if you never attach your name to any baggage.
      Thanks.

      Reply
  13. Kristie says

    November 25, 2022 at 10:06 am

    Wow. What a well-crafted story. You had me from the green ribbon.

    Reply
    • John Holmes says

      November 27, 2022 at 5:36 am

      Thanks Kristie, glad you liked it.

      Reply

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